Friday, December 25, 2009

Love is...

...not easy to explain.

You just kind of have to find it. : )

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Stay here.

So, I've noticed a rising trend in my generation.

We all hate thinking about the future.

I think I know why that is too.

So far, life has been pretty rough...for all of us.  School has only gotten more competitive, the internet has forced social exchange on everyone, and parents are becoming more and more careless by the day.

Whether you're living in South Brooke or somewhere in inner city Decatur...this generation is suffering from far too many things to keep life straight anymore.

Life is hard.  That's all we know.  While we're aware that the future can be better, we're not necessarily convinced that it will be.  That's why we're keeping it right here...in the present.  We can't think about the past.  We're all too busy to remember the good times.  Our good times are so few and far between that, if we didn't write them down in a journal or blog about them, they might be lost forever. 

It's sort of disheartening, the way we live.

Yes, we're lazier...but we have all the reason in the world to not trust what lies ahead of us.  We don't think straight because, even when we try our hardest, our 1 + 1 attitude won't always get us a 2.  Understand me, people?  Things that were supposed to make sense...because they made sense with every generation before us...have no structure to us.  Life becomes one big line when you have nothing to base it off of.

Listen...I'm not saying that we have nothing to look forward to...just that the lives we're all leading won't get us where we want to go...if we even know where we want to go.  Most of us are clueless on that one too.

Thoughts?

Suggestions?

Concerns?

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Hate

I wish I didn't.

: (

Friday, September 4, 2009

Jacob doesn't need friends...

My life has changed.  I've become unimportant in the lives of many people.  I did it.  I made a conscious decision to stop talking to these people.  Who does that?  It wasn't even an experiment.  I just wanted to do it.  There was little thought process involved.  I'm just sadistic.

I think you'll understand when I say those people (some of you) don't "need" me.  Those that do need me have made an effort to keep me close.  We are all needed by the people around us...just not all of them.  Life isn't a fairytale.  Not everybody is going to love you.  Many of them, however, will depend on you until the day they die.

It's just one of the important things I've learned lately.

Listen.  I don't care about video games.  I don't care about movies.  I don't care about Facebook.  I don't care about pictures.  Music is dead to me.  The only thing that has any worth to me is love.  Everything I own could be gone tomorrow when I wake up...and I wouldn't bat an eye.  I couldn't do that if I woke up tomorrow and my family decided never to talk to me again...or God seized to exist.  My father once told me that we all, at some point in our lives, hang on to a thread that's just too loose...and we fall.  I'm just wondering if that thread is too loose right now. 

My friends are all but gone.  Communication is at an all-time low.  It's like I depend on the people I don't know to somehow make my day better.  I'm a missionary in my hometown.  It's strange!  I am gaining a knack for talking to people I don't know, however.  I'm liking that!  It keeps people from being lonely.

Something else I learned tonight...

Don't drop out of school.

Please.

Don't.

No matter how awesome you "know" you are...or how much you're getting for selling crack...an education will be important sooner than you think.

Here's a message to all females:

Don't date guys who dropped out of school.  For the love of K Fed, please stay away from these guys!  Their wife-beaters, spiky hair, and "sexy Chinese lettering tattoos" will mean nothing to you when you're living in a double-wide.

( + 10 points if you thought I was gonna say "...when you're livin' in a van down by the river!")

Trust me.  It was tempting.

Actually, general rule of thumb...let your father assess your boyfriend.  Let him be brutally honest.  Don't cry about it.  Just listen.  If your father has talked to him enough to make a fair judgment...he's probably right about your guy...good or bad.  Dads are harsh.  Enjoy the security while you can.

Here's a message to all males:

Don't date unsupportive girls!

( + 5 points if you know "unsupportive" is not an actual word. Thank you, Firefox.)

If a girl can't accept everything you are...the immaturity, the quirks, the less-than-stellar jokes...don't give her a second glance.

If you find yourself dating an unsupportive girl, stop.  It's as easy as that.

This works if you're a female as well.  If the guy doesn't care enough to do things you want to do and congratulate you when you've done something you're proud of...dump him.  Do it.  Now.  Seriously.

Let me end this post with a happy thought:

People DO care about you.  The world will never be as heartless as you imagine it on your darkest days.  People love you.  People want to see you enjoy your life.  Whether someone has told you that lately or not, it will always be true of every individual.

"Even my greatest of enemies will grow love of some capacity in my heart."
- Anonymous

Goodnight, everyone.  Please have a good weekend.

Your civil servant,
Jacob Smith (Dante)

Saturday, August 29, 2009

You know me. Seriously...you do.

Whether you think you do or not, you know me fairly well.

Let's list some things that I am:

- White (Italian, mainly)
- Medium height (short to some...)
- Of average intelligence... (Although test scores say I'm above 98% of American students...which scares me greatly!)
- Obsessed with video games
- Obsessed with pop culture in general
- A friend of Jesus
- Psychotic
- Fairly good at giving relationship advice
- Confident
- Caring
- Easy to get along with

Well...if you didn't know me, you do now.  I'm not complicated.  I used to try to be...or at least convince people that I was.  I'm not though.  Don't worry.  : )

Please...tell me about yourselves.

Better yet...does anyone need advice on anything?  Ask away, kids.  I love talking.  Most of you that graduated know I love talking.

By the way...can I just give one big apology to everyone I graduated with?  I'm sorry I was a loner all those years.  I'm sorry I didn't talk to some of you.  I'm sorry I put everyone is a "group".  That's lame.  I wish I could go back and do things differently...maybe change a few more peoples' lives or just leave you guys with a better opinion of me.  I wasn't very school spirit-oriented.  I didn't get involved (drama doesn't count...lols).  I wish I had played baseball.  I LOVE baseball!

Oh well.

I wish everyone the best.  It's good to see some of you getting married and earning respectable jobs.  Now...some of you need to try a little harder.  I may still work at McDonalds...but at least I'm paying for my own school. : )  Believe me...when I'm done with school...I'm outta here.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Attention Cool Kids!!!

Yeah...

So, I know what you're thinking: "Jake...you aren't THAT crazy.  I'm crazier than you are!"

Well...

No.

No, you aren't.

If you find yourself being a lot like me or doing things resembling my lifestyle on a daily basis...I urge you to seek professional help.  This will help: 

WHOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!  This is amazing!!! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDBpQVhCMb8

Alright...let's get started here.

( + 10 points if you at at McDonald's in the passed three days)

Yeah, I was working when you got your food...I guarantee it!  I've worked far too much lately.  It's not that I particularly WANT to work.  I just need the money.  I have school to pay off.  Also, I have a girlfriend!  She claims to be inexpensive though.  I don't care how "inexpensive" she thinks she is...I'll buy her things she doesn't even LIKE...just so I can spend money on her. : )  She never asks for anything.  I mean, fo' reelz yo!  This girl's legit!  How many of you guys are looking for a girl like that?  All of you, you say?  FIND YOUR OWN!!!  Lols...I digress.  Other than that, I just need to keep money back for other things in the future.  Oh...and if your food wasn't that good...I wasn't working.  I like to maintain quality...even if it makes everyone working with me angry.  : )

( - 10 points if you work with me) ...sorry, Shelby.

I'm glad that you all invited people to my group...even if you were a little ridiculous about it.  Keep inviting people.  I mean, it's not necessarily important that everyone reads this blog.  I just want it to get big enough that Peter Jackson sees it and produces my first masterpiece.

That brings me to my next point.  I'm currently working on a horror film.  I'd like a little help with some stuff though.  Although she doesn't know it yet, Cori (my sister) and I will be writing the script soon.  Yes...it will be extremely campy. : )  Without a budget, it's nigh impossible to create a horror film that people can take seriously.  Also...I'm expecting some actors to volunteer.  If you can act...or even if you can't, but think you can (because I'm sure we'll see you regardless)...please let me know.  I'll be writing more on that later.

Just remember: Project Bludgeon. : )

I want criticism.  Seriously.

Tell me what's wrong with me.

Am I a jerk?  Am I a loser?  Do I talk to much?  Am I lazy?  I'd like to know.  If I have come off as a jerk to anyone...and I mean ANYONE...let me know.  Life's too short to not love everyone. 

Let's wrap this "shorterthaniwasexpecting" blog entry up with a little segment I like to call "What the heck, Jake?"

This is where I tell a story and you worry about my mental stability.

So...

I was at work yesterday when I got bored.  I asked if I could take a short bathroom break because we weren't busy.  So, I go to the little guys room...stand in front of the urinal...and start texting.  On the way in, I had noticed that a rather large individual (or so I was led to believe by his shadow) was in the actual stall, sitting down.  Now, I'm not sure how many of you have noticed it at this point in your lives, but when a person is in a stall and another person walks in the bathroom...their bowels seize to move.  It's an automatic reaction to other human beings watching you do that. 

Anyway,
I'm there...just texting muh gurl (Hi, Shelby!)...and this guy freezes!  He goes from rustling about, coughing, and breathing heavily...to complete silence.  So...I do what any respectable kid would do in my situation.

I kept texting.

I had planned on being in there for a minute tops.  Now...this was a game.  This was a challenge.  This was entertainment.  I wanted to see how long this ol' portly chap could last without losing his mind and giving in to the discomfort.  I made a bet with myself.  If this guy could hold out another two minutes, I'd congratulate him on the way out.  If he couldn't, I'd punish him.

It's also another rather common fact that when someone turns on the automatic hand dryer...the person in the stall goes about his or her business...knowing that they have just enough time to feel semi-accomplished.

He lost. : )

Within 45 seconds of my betting myself, the man gasped for air.  His breathing and rustling had continued.  One thing hadn't though.  : )  His bowels.

Perhaps the man knew full well that having anyone in the same bathroom with you makes the majority of people uncomfortable.  He was playing the game. 

This is what I did:

- I put my hands under the sink.
- I turned the water on...slowly...
- Reaching for the soap, I exclaimed, "Dang it!  They're out of soap again!"  (They weren't.)
- I turned the water off.
- I hit the towel machine a couple of times to get a towel out.
(Keep in mind...I've been in here for about 5 minutes...)
- I dry my hands off a little.
- I walk over to the automatic hand dryer and hit the button.

Yep.  Just like I had planned it...the man was good to go.  It was too good to pass up though. I quickly put my hand over the vent of the hand dryer...to silence it.   His reaction was nothing short of epic.

It was almost as if he knew I was messing with him.

He starts laughing.  Yes.  Laughing.  Whether it was to cover up the noise or because he thought something was funny, I'll never know.  Regardless, I'm impressed.  Most people would have coughed a few times and gotten back in prone position until I was gone.  No.  This guy was good.

This hand dryer turned off...

As I left the restroom...I left him with this greeting: "Well played, good sir.  Well played."

I could hear him laughing well after I closed the door behind me.





That's my story, folks.

I hope you enjoyed it.

Goodnight, kids.

- Crazy

I shouldn't be alive...

The result of yesterday and today's beatings upon my physical and mental self is not pretty.

My body can't take this much longer.

: (

Thought for you all to just sit and ponder:

Hugs and kisses can only do so much.  When you have time to talk to the one peroson who understands you...TALK TO THEM!  In the name of all that which does not suck...TALK TO THEM!

*sigh*

( + 5 points if you are still happy...)