Thursday, August 28, 2008

Sexiest blog this side of the Dixie...

This is, in fact, my first blog. Depending on how much you people like it...this could be my last. Enjoy...

First off, I'd like to make a shoutout to the two "blog-masters" of the school: Willie Mac and Adam Morris. I may not have the experience, but some people are just naturally talented.

(+ 10 points for anyone that said "that's what she said" after that last sentence.)

What's up with not being able to call people "ho" here? Why is that so offensive? I give every single one of you permission to call me a ho. In fact, call your friends and family members ho too. If they don't like it, show them THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8AkKnLMELo

(+ 15 points for anyone that sat through that monstrosity.)

I'm not gonna lie to you people, I miss Illinois. Up there, we had the Disney Channel, we got to watch the leaves turn pretty colors in the fall, everybody said "syrup" the RIGHT way, and we had fast food that was...well...fast! I miss it all...the high taxes, the high crime rate, the high teenagers...

(+ 10 points if you caught that joke...) (- 5 points if you laughed at it.)

All of my friends said being down here would be good for me...because heat makes you sweat...and sweat makes you lose weight. I know...great friends, right? Turns out, Alabama is just as hot and humid as Decatur frickin' Illinois. LAME!

That's about all I got right now. Leave some feedback, ho's...

Love and enlightenment,
Jacob Smith





Disclaimer: I apologize sincerely to any and all actual prostitutes I may have offended.